2023 has finally come to an end and there are great lessons that I picked up along the way. From learning that I am my greatest advocate, to realizing that weight training isn’t just for the fellas, and falling in love with the color pink, let’s just say it’s been a wholesome year. To explore more of these lessons and the others as well, keep reading.
When the year ends, I like to take the last few days whereby it feels we’re just cruising through, to take stock of the year that has been and reflect on the lessons learned. No matter what happened this year, I am pretty sure that there are lessons you have picked up along the way. As I share mine, I am sure there are some you will likely resonate with. Also, feel free to share your biggest lessons for 2023 in the comments. Let’s get into it.
1. Learn to keep your cards close to your chest until the time is right.
Some of us need to learn to shut up! Especially when something good is happening in our lives. Whether it’s a new job, house, relationship or baby, it is important to keep what’s going on just to yourself or your inner circle. Why? Because dreams are safely nurtured in privacy and they are much more likely to come to fruition this way, plus people can’t ruin what they don’t know. Moving in silence holds power.
2. Not all your relatives are your family
Some, you are just related by blood but there is no relationship. And, you are not obligated to have one with them. If you’ve seen and experienced shady behavior from them in the past, take note, love from a far and put up boundaries, it’s for your own good.
3. Confidence most often takes preeminence over competence
They never taught us this in school. When you leave school and get into the real world, you will realize that the ones who make it aren’t the most competent , like they may not have been the smartest in school, but they are confident. It’s good to have good grades, but don’t forget to nurture that confidence. It will take you further than you may think.
4. The greatest investment you can make is in you
Don’t forget to pour into yourself first, before you pour into others. When your cup is empty, you will have nothing to give.
5. It is not your responsibility to heal/fix anyone
This is why we have doctors and therapists for this. Unburden yourself from the need to save or rescue people from things that they have the responsibility to rescue themselves from. It’s such a heavy burden to be everyone’s rescuer.
6. God is a meticulous planner
Hence why you need to relinquish the need to control every single thing. Live your life, always doing your best to be in alignment with God’s will, and everything will fall into place.
7. If it’s for you, it’s yours, if it’s not, something else is
There is a place for you! Whenever you face rejection, just know that it is redirection towards what is meant just for you.
8. Train your mind to see things and people, as they are and not as you want them to be
This will save you so much heartache. I tended to get into my head and fantasize a lot, especially when it came to men! But when I decided to see people and things just as they were, saved me a lot of heartache and situation-ships lol.
9. You are your greatest advocate
If you don’t speak out, no one else will do it for you. And I have also realized it starts with the small things. For example, you’ve gone to get your nails done but the nail tech is doing something different from what you asked for. What do you do? Most of us would just sit there while they do the WRONG thing, and even pay for the WRONG thing. This isn’t healthy. Speak out and advocate for yourself. You’ll also see that it will pour into other areas of your life.
10. Push, God will pull
Do your best, do what you can, and let God do what HE can. Push, He will pull.
11. Faith without action is dead
If you are looking for a job, taking your CV to your church to be prayed for is great, but what else are you doing about it? Are you sending out applications? Are you making use of platforms like Linked In to connect with the people who may actually give you a job? If you are looking to get into a relationship, are you leaving your house? Are you going out to meet new people? Action.
12. The patterns will continue patterning (repeating) until YOU put a stop to it
Scenario: you have a falling out with a friend and you guys no longer talk to each other. Instead of trying to address the issue, you choose to avoid it completely, and tell yourself, ‘oh, who needs them, I will make other friends.’ time passes and you make other friends, then inevitably conflict arises with your new friends. Since you haven’t learned to have hard conversations, the pattern will keep repeating until you learn how to repair your relationships after conflict. Get it?
13. Face your life
You could try to scroll, drink, or party the pain and issues that you are facing away, but they will still be there. The solution would be to take the bull by the horns, accept your reality, ask God for help and take the necessary action.
14. Ladies, weight training isn’t just for the guys and it won’t make you look bulky
As long as you do it right, weight training can change your entire body for the better. Ever since I started going to the gym and lifting weights more, I have become fitter, stronger, more toned. I have lost weight, reduced fat and gained more muscle. The best thing about it is when you build muscle, your body continue to burn calories, even when you’re not actively working on them, thus maintaining that toned look. Cool, right?
15. Also ladies, heal and settle into your feminine energy, it will change your life
Walking in your feminine energy doesn’t necessarily mean all of a sudden liking girly things especially if that’s not your thing. It is simply settling into your true essence as a woman, just like God made you to be. It doesn’t mean not showing up for your dreams and achieving things, you can do those things, just with warmth, elegance, class and grace. I don’t think I can encompass all that I have learned about this in one point, but I encourage you to look it up. Life is so much better here.
16. Let people’s behavior towards you be the guiding tool to where you place them in your life, not their words or promises
People can say whatever they need to say to get their way, but their actions will tell you everything you need to know. They know what to say to you because they have studied you and they know what makes you tick. Instead of believing their words, observe their actions and act accordingly.
17. I still believe pineapple belongs on pizza! It’s so delicious!
If you haven’t tried it, you’re missing out!
18. Elevation requires separation
The further you go in life, the less people you’ll have in your corner, and that is okay.
19. Life is a fight. Put on your helmet and get in the ring
It’s just the way it is. Hard work, dedication, discipline and consistency are not overrated. Mastering these principles will take you far. Nobody that you see out here, who has achieved great things in a genuine way, hasn’t fought for what they have. So, sometimes in life, you’ll have to fight for what you want.
20. A simple way to build confidence on your own is to start keeping the promises you make to yourself
I like this because you won’t need anyone, it’s all you. Start with the small promises, like saying you’ll wake up at a certain time, then build on that. Keeping promises to yourself builds that inner confidence and trust, then that pours into other areas of your life.
21. Pink is such a pretty color. It’s officially one of my favorites
My favorite colors are purple, jungle green, and my latest addition from this year, PINK!
22. Networking and knowing people is cool, but you can never compete with God’s favor!
God’s favor will open so many doors for you and can take you further than your efforts can. God’s favor breaks protocol and goes beyond what’s possible. Don’t sleep on His favor.
23. Learn to be your own person. Individuate!
I think this would be the greatest lesson for me in 2023, individuating. We have all grown up a certain way and being told certain things. But, as you grow older and begin having your own life, it is important to learn be your own person. With your values and principles in tact, what kind of life do you want to live? What kind of partner do you want to spend the rest of your life with? Even if it’s against the norm of what you are used to, when you individuate and can clearly see yourself as an autonomous and independent individual, it will give you the courage to go for it, even if its not what people are used to seeing.
Thank you for reading through and thank you for being here this year. Whether you’ve known about my blog since the beginning, or this is your first time here, thank you! I hope this post has inspired you and caused you to end 2023 in style.
Remember to share your greatest 2023 lessons in the comments.
I hope your 2023 was great, and even if it wasn’t, 2024 is just a few hours away. Who knows what blessings this new year is holding for you?
Happy new year 2024!
Xoxo,
Miss Kambe.
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