It’s 2024 and it’s time that we learn to be a better friend to the friends we already have, and to the friends we will make in the future. I always say this, and even mentioned it in a previous blog post titled , ‘If you want better friendships, read this' .If you want to have better friendships, start by being a better friend. It starts with you. Here are three ways you can be a better friend in 2024.
1. Learn how to repair after hard times
I genuinely think that a skill we all should learn, and should probably be taught in school, is how we can repair a friendship after conflict, disagreement or a rough patch. In today’s culture, we are so quick to cut off people and we seem to have a very black and white perspective when it comes to friendships. Immediately there’s a problem, we cut off that friend, we ghost them or we simply stop speaking until there’s no friendship anymore. Not all friendships are worth saving, true, but it is important to remember that people are not as disposable as you may think. Social media may have you out here thinking that you can just cut off people, even genuinely good friends who may have messed up once and instead of at least giving a chance for your friendship to repair, you chose to end it. Of course, not every negative incident warrants repair, but I think it’s important to at least give yourself and your friend a chance. Here are some steps you can follow to repair a friendship;
- Address the issue as soon as possible. If your friend wont be the one to bring it up, be the one who does. Addressing an issue means you care enough about the friendship to solve it and move past it.
- Focus on the problem instead of the person. You’re not fighting against the person, you’re fighting for the person by addressing the issue. Keeping this in mind will give you the appropriate language when addressing the issue. Instead of attacking your friend like, 'you are this or that' because of something they did, use 'I' statements and focus on the issue at hand. For example, 'I felt hurt when you cut me off when i was speaking' Here, you're focused on what your friend did that hurt you, and not who they are as a person. You get it?
- If all else fails, at least you tried. If you had tried to address an issue in the past, but didn’t resolve it, or your friend wasn’t willing to move past it, at least you did your part and this should be enough to keep your conscience clear.
2. Be genuinely curious about your friend
I usually find it so interesting the way you can be friends with someone for a while, but barely know much about them. In this case I mean where they live, how many siblings they have, where they work, what they do for work, how their daily routine looks like. Of course, it is not a must we know every single detail of our friends’ lives to have a stringer relationship, but showing genuine curiosity is a great place to start. Make your friend feel seen and heard but showing genuine curiosity of their lives. You may find that you have more things in common that could strengthen your friendship.
3. Remember their important milestones, and acknowledge and celebrate
Maybe it’s just me, but I feel some type of way when a friend I would consider close forgets or fails to acknowledge important days, like my birthday. I also feel bad when I for some reason forget to acknowledge a friend’s birthday or major milestone like a graduation. A way to strengthen your friendships is remembering and acknowledging your friend’s important days. Like if it’s their birthday, if you can treat them with gifts, do it, but simply acknowledging that day by calling or shooting them a sweet text, may mean more to them than you could ever know. It’s a simple way to show that you care and are a present friend, and who wouldn’t want to be friends with a person like this?
In conclusion, like I said, it's 2024, let's maintain or create amazing relationships, starting with the friendships we already have.
I hope you've enjoyed this post, and I will see you on the next one!
xoxo,
Miss Kambe.
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